Happy Father's Day to a dad who was smart enough to teach me how to mow the lawn so he would't have to.
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Q:What's the most dangerous job in America?
A: The graveyard shift at a KFC in the projects.
239
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First man: "I follow the medical profession."
Second man: "Are you a doctor?"
First man: "No, I'm an undertaker."
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"Mommy," Little Johnny asked, "do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time'?"
"No, dear," she replied. "Sometimes they start with 'Darling, I'll be working late at the office tonight...'"
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One day a miserable toothbrush sits down and says, "Sometimes I feel I have the worst job in the world."
Then the toilet paper yells, "Think again buddy!"
