Q: What animal rotates at least 200 times after it dies?
A: A rotisserie chicken.
207
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One day little Johnny was digging a hole in his back yard.
The next-door neighbor spotted him and decided to investigate.
"Hello Johnny, what are you up to?" he asked.
"My goldfish died and I'm gonna bury him," Johnny replied.
"That's a really big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" asked the neighbor.
"That's because he's inside your cat!"
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How many animals can you get into a pair of tights?
10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 beaver, 1 ass, 1 p*ssy, thousands of hares and a dead fish no one can ever find.
475
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You might kill two birds with one stone, but Chuck Norris kills two stones with one bird.
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Chuck norris once killed a bear with an imaginary knife.