Q: What is the difference between Election day and Thanksgiving day? A: On Thanksgiving, you get a turkey for the day; on Election day, you get a turkey for four years.

We ask the president to make laws. The president asks Chuck Norris.

Q: What's the difference between death and taxes? A: Congress doesn't meet every year to make death worse.

The pentagon said they had too many generals running around, so they decided to get rid of some of them. They offered $10,000 in severance pay for each inch of their body to be measured however they chose. The Air Force general went first. He said he wanted to be measured from his head to his toe. He was 69 inches. He received $690,000. Next up was the Army general. He wanted to be measured from the tip of his finger to the tip of his other finger. It was 80 inches. He received $800,000. The two generals were very happy with their earnings. Finally the Marine general came up. H ... read more

Q: How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb? A: Just one, but millions volunteered to get rid of anything dark