Q: How can you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose? A: Her ankles swell up when she farts.

What's the definition of bravery? A man with diarrhea chancing a fart!

Q: Why do farts smell? A: So deaf people can enjoy them, too.

Bill Gates, Andy Grove, and Jerry Sanders (CEOs of MicroSoft, Intel, and AMD) were in a high-powered business meeting. During the serious, tense discussion, a beeping noise suddenly is emitted from where Bill is sitting. Bill says, “Oh, that’s my beeper. Gentlemen, excuse me, I need to take this call.” So Bill lifts his wristwatch to his ear and begins talking into the end of his tie. After completing this call, he notices the others are staring at him. Bill explains, “Oh, this is my new emergency communication system. I have an earpiece built into my watch and a microphone sewn into t ... read more

Why do women always fart only when they go to the bathroom? They have to blow dry—and there's nothing to shake.