Q. How do you know when you are getting old? A. When you start having dry dreams and wet farts.

 496

0  

Question: Why do men fart more than women? Answer: Because women won’t shut up long enough to build up pressure.

 456

0  

How do you know when a blonde has a brain fart? Her ears flap.

 471

0  

I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me... Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.

 545

0  

I farted in a room of hipsters and I watched them fight each other over who heard it first.

 988

0