I forgot to post on Facebook I was going to the gym. Now this whole workout was a waste of time.

 1683

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I do two hours of cardio every day. But I still need to find the closest parking spot to the gym.

 1471

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When Chuck Norris works out at the gym, he doesn't sweat. The weights do.

 647

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Just been to the gym and there's a new machine. Only used it for an hour as I started to feel sick. Its good though, it does everything 'Kitkats, Mars bars, Snickers and crisps'!

 1490

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Doctor: "Yes, what is it I can do for you?" Blond: "Doctor, yesterday, when I was doing my yoga, one of my friends told me that if I did this particular exercise, all my body’s blood would go into my head. But, when I stand, why doesn’t anyone say that all the blood would go into the legs?" Doctor: "The fact’s your legs are not that hollow as your head is."

 769

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