Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. Men will screw anything.

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Q: How can you tell when a man is dead? A: He stays stiff for more than two minutes.

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Why do men buy electric lawn mowers? So they can find their way back to the house.

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Did you hear about the man who got a vasectomy at Sears? Now every time he gets excited, the garage door goes up.

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3 guys walk into a bar The first guy says "I have got the smallest arm in? the world" The second guy "I have the smallest head in the world" The third guy "I have got the smallest d*ck in the world" The 3 guys go to the Guinness World Records. The first guy comes back and says "I really do have the smallest arm in the world" The second guy comes back and says "Amazing, I do have the smallest head in the world" The third guy comes back angry " Who the F*CK is JUSTIN BEIBER?

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