A dog walks into a pub, and takes a seat.
He says to the barman, "Can I have a pint of lager and a packet of crisps please".
The barman says, "Wow, that's amazing! You should join the circus!"
The dog replies, "Why? Do they need electricians?"
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Q: What was the last thing her husband said to her?
A: I'll feed the dog, you feed the fish.
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How do you know when a baby is a dead baby?
The dog plays with it more.
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Why was the cannibal looking peeky?
Because he had just eaten a Chinese dog!
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Yo' Mama is so nasty, when her dog farts, she takes the credit.