Labradoodles were made when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a Labrador and a Poodle at the same time.

Q: Why do dogs lick their balls? A: Because they can. Q: So why do they stick their noses in women's crotches? A: Same reason.

Q: What is the difference between a dogs ass and liberals? A: Nancy Pelosi won't kiss a dogs ass!

"Does your dog bite?" "No." (Tries to touch dog. Dog bites him) "Argh! I thought you said your dog doesn't bite!" "That is not my dog."

A mother and her young son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. The son turned from the window to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" The mother said, "Well, maybe that's something you could ask the stewardess." So the boy asked the stewardess, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" The stewardess responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me?" The boy admitted that this was the case. "Well, then, tell your mother that ther ... read more