In what type of weather is the vet the busiest? When its raining cats and dogs.

Question: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? Answer: The dog, because he’ll shut up after you let him in.

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A.A dog is always happy to see you B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.

Yo' Mama is so nasty, when her dog farts, she takes the credit.

A guy walks into a bar with a dog under his arm, puts the dog on the bar and announces that the dog can talk and that he has $100 he's willing to bet anyone who says he can't. The bartender quickly takes the bet and the owner looks at the dog and asks, "What's the thing on top of this building which keeps the rain from coming inside?" The dog answers "ROOF." The bartender says, "Who are you kidding? I'm not paying." The dogs owner says, "How about double or nothing and I'll ask him something else". The bartender agrees and the owner turns to the dog and asks, "Who was the greatest b ... read more