A gang of thieves broke into a blood bank last night and stole a hundred pints of blood. Police are still hunting for the clots.

 714

0  

The judge: Why did you shoot the rabbit without being a member of the hunters association? The inculpated: Why did the rabbit eat cabbage from my garden, without being a family member?

 1003

0  

A biologist, a chemist and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5th to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses 5th to the right. The statistician yells "We got 'em!"

 1567

0  

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his phone and calls emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies: "Take it easy. I can help. First, we have to be sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the hunter says, "Ok, now what?"

 824

0  

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

 719

0