A local barber in my area just got arrested for selling drugs. Blew my mind. I’ve been his customer for years. I had no idea he was a barber.

 444

1  

A: "Excuse me. Do you know the way to the zoo?" B: "No, I'm sorry I don't." A: "Well, it's two blocks this way, then one block to the left."

 797

0  

A man meets an accident with his new Ferrari. A policeman arrives. Man: (Cried) Officer! My brand new car! Police: You’re such a materialistic person. You even haven’t notice that your left arm has been cut off. Man: (He looks at his left arm and yells) OMG! My Rolex watch!

 817

0  

My Girlfriend broke up with me. She thinks that I am childish. So I calmed down, took a deep breath, went to her house, rang the doorbell and ran away.

 436

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THE BIGGEST LIE Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says, “Why are you arguing?” One boy answers, “We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie.” “You should be ashamed of yourselves,” Said the teacher, “When I was your age I didn’t even know what a lie was.” The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.

 404

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