John: Bro I’ve invited 17 people to watch a movie, would you come? Bro: ok John, but why so many people? John: Because the DVD said “Only 18+ viewers.” Bro: Wait, what?

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THE BIGGEST LIE Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says, “Why are you arguing?” One boy answers, “We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie.” “You should be ashamed of yourselves,” Said the teacher, “When I was your age I didn’t even know what a lie was.” The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.

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Salesgirl: Sir No smoking in the shop Man: But I purchased cigarette from your shop. Salesgirl: Sir we sell condoms too.

 730

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A: "Excuse me. Do you know the way to the zoo?" B: "No, I'm sorry I don't." A: "Well, it's two blocks this way, then one block to the left."

 717

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Wife was in the ICU Doctor: It seems she is in a coma Husband: Please save her doctor. She is just 30 Suddenly the ECG started beeping, a hand moved and her lips mumbled. And she spoke: I’m not 30, I’m just 29.

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