Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator? A: "What are you shaking about, it's me she's going to eat."

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Q: What do you call a teenage girl who doesn't masturbate? A: Liar.

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Q: How do you cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? A: Tell them you can't cum.

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Chuck Norris doesn't m*sturbate, he r*pes his hand.

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Q: What's the ultimate rejection? A: When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.

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