Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" - and he died.
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Why did the Mexican take Xanax?
For hispanic attacks.
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Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI
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Q: What is the chemical formula for "banana"?
A: BaNa2
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."
The neutron says "Are you sure?"
The proton replies "I'm positive."
