As an ion chromatography chemist I made this one up: Anions aren't negative, they're just misunderstood. 1953 1
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist? A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium. 918 0
Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here." Helium doesn't react. 2108 1
