Q: How long does it take before a pound of weed goes bad? A: I don't know! I've never had it longer than an hour!

Yo mama so short when she smokes weed, she cant even get high.

How do you suffocate a nigger? Tell him there's weed inside the pillowcase.

A little lizard was walking through the forest to see his pal the monkey. The monkey call out hey little buddy come up here I got some great pot. So the little lizard climbed up the tree. The little lizard and the monkey smoked a great big joint. The little lizard said hey this stuff is great but I have horrible cottonmouth. Well there is a river just down there. So the little lizard walk down the tree through the brush and started to drink the water. All of a sudden a crocodile came out of the water. Hey little buddy waz up said the croc, "I just got stoned with my pal the monke ... read more

Police Officer: "How high are you?" Pothead: "No officer, it's "Hi, How are you?"