A husband and wife are having financial troubles. They agree she should walk the streets to pick up some extra cash. The husband drops his wife off in the red light area of town, and returns 6 hours later. She gets in the car and says, "Look, I made $40.50 !" "What jerk gave you 50 cents?" he asks. "All of them!"

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Chuck Norris is never late... time is just early.

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Big inspection on a build site/yard. The boss tells the workers : what ever happens just act as usual. The inspection committee were inspecting when a wall just colapses. -(Worker looking at his watch) : 10:15, just on time

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The world ends on December 21st, 2012. Only because that's when Chuck Norris masters the Falco Punch.

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Q: What's the difference between death and taxes? A: Congress doesn't meet every year to make death worse.

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