blonde asked someone what time it was, and the person told her it was 3:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied, "You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."

 195

0  

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. He only brought enough money for one beer though. As hes drinking his beer, which was quite expensive, he realizes how bad he has to go to the bathroom. Not wanting anyone to drink his expensive beer, he takes out a 3x5 note card and writes on it, "I SPIT IN THIS BEER", and walks to the bathroom. When he comes back about 15 minutes later, theres another 3x5 note card next to his beer saying, "I SPIT IN IT TOO".

 389

0  

Chuck Norris once slapped a man into next week. The man was missing for four and a half years.

 216

0  

Chuck Norris once raced light. He is still waiting for it to catch up.

 198

0  

"Backspace key"... hiding feelings since ages.

 3997

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