Did you hear about the baby who swallowed a pin? It was OK. It was a safety pin.

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A: We have to stick together.

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A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.

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"What do you want to be when you grow up?" "A doctor?" "And why's that?" "Because it's the only profession where you can tell women to take off their clothes and then stick their husbands with the bill."

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The houseman invited over his boss and partners, for lunch. With them, his little 5year-old daughter was there. "Don’t you want to say the prayers before lunch, so Our Holly Father give us his blessings?," asks the father. "But... I don’t know what to say...," the little girl admits. "Just say what you heard your mommy say last time inside the kitchen!," said her mother to help her. And the girl: "Oh, God! Why in this life, my husband must invite all these people for lunch?"

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