A little girl is in line to see Santa. When it's her turn, she climbs up on Santa's lap. Santa asks, "What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?" The little girl replies, "I want a Barbie and a G.I. Joe." Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says, "I thought Barbie comes with Ken." "No," said the little girl. "She comes with G.I. Joe, she fakes it with Ken."

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It was graduation day and Mom was trying to take a picture of their son in a cap and gown, posed with his father. "Let’s try to make this look natural" she said. "Junior, put your arm around your dad’s shoulder." The father answered, "If you want it to look natural, why not have him put his hand in my pocket?"

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Anxiety: Getting up to see why the baby isn’t crying.

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Light was heard saying to his son, "Keep practicing and one day you will be faster than the speed of Usain."

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Yo' Mama is so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, the kids yell, "Here comes the school bus."

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