He was such a big baby that the doctor was afraid to slap him.

The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real. It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.

The parish priest needs his house painted so he offers the job to one of his altar boys. The first day the kid paints the entire inside of the house, he’s sweating like hell but eventually gets it finished. The priest commends him on the work and with a flourish hands him a £5.00 note. The boy looks at the money and says to the priest, "Thanks very much Father,...you’re a virgin." The priest is a bit startled but makes no remark. The next day the boy has to paint the outside of the house; it’s a really hot day and he just manages to finish the job without collapsing. The priest looks ... read more

A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl? B: It's a girl. She's my daughter. A: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father. B: I'm not. I'm her mother.

A young boy and his dad went out fishing one fine morning. After a few quiet hours out in the boat, the boy became curious about the world around him. He looked up at his dad and asked "How do fish breath under water?" His dad thought about it for a moment, then replied, "I really don’t know, son." The boy sat quietly from another moment, then turned back to his dad and asked, "How does our boat float on the water?" Once again his dad replied, "Don’t know, son." Pondering his thoughts again, a short while later, the boy asks "Why is the sky blue?" Again, his dad replied. "Don’t know, ... read more