Q: How big is a Republican-size bed?
A: Wide enough for the man, the woman, and the ten-foot pole.
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Q: In what way are Democrats more generous than Republicans?
A: Unlike Republicans, Democrats are not only generous with their own money, but also with other people's money.
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Q: When will scientists cure the common cold?
A: Actually, they already did but Republican pharmacists won't dispense it because they mistook it for birth control.
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Q: Why did the Republican cross the road?
A: There was a black guy on the first side.
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Q: Why do they say elephants never forget?
A: They haven't met Alberto Gonzalez.