Q: Why do rednecks like having sex doggie style? A: That way they can both watch wrestling.

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This couple had been dating for about six months, but the guy had been afraid to make any s*xual advances because of his tiny organ. Finally one night, he gets up his courage, and takes her to a secluded spot in his car. While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his p*nis. "No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."

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This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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What has 100 teeth and eats weiners? A zipper!

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A guy walks into a pharmacy and buys a pack of condoms. The cashier asks him if he wants a bag. He responds, "No, she's not that ugly."

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