Do you know why babys cry when they are born? Because they know they are entering the world with chuck Norris in it.

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What is height of Laziness? Adopting a child.

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Q: What's brown and taps on the window? A: A baby in a microwave!

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Whats the difference in a seagull and a babys diaper? A seagull flits across the shore and a baby shits across the floor.

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Who held the baby octopus to ransom? Squidnappers.

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