Stonehenge was made by Chuck Norris stacking blocks as a baby.

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A frightened investor goes to his financial planner and asks if he’s at all worried about the volatility of the markets these days. The planner replies that he sure does! In fact, he says that he sleeps like a baby. The frightened investor was amazed! "Really? Even with all the fluctuations?" "Yup! I sleep for a couple of hours, and then I wake up and I cry for a couple of hours."

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The reason newborn babies cry is because they know they have just entered a world with Chuck Norris.

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Q: Why was the black baby crying? A: He had diarea and thought he was melting.

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What's brown and gurgles? A baby in a casserole.

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