Me: "Here comes the airplane!" Baby: Opens mouth. Me: "OH NO! It's the Taliban!" Hits baby in the forehead with the spoon. "KA-BOOM"
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The reason newborn babies cry is because they know they have just entered a world with Chuck Norris.
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Q: How do you get a zombie baby into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Doritos.
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Dustin and Jane (both blonde) were delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby had come to an end. The adoption center called and told them they had a wonderful Russian baby boy, and the couple took him without hesitation. On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped by the local college so they each could enroll in night courses. After they filled out the form, the registration clerk inquired, “What ever possessed you to study Russian?” The couple said proudly, “We just adopted a Russian baby and in a year or so he’ll start to talk. We just want to be able to unde ... read more
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What do you name an Asian baby with problems? Sum ting wong.
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