What did God say when he created the first nigger? Opps, I put the pubes on his head.

Daughter: Mom,does God go to bathroom? Mom: Why? my child.. Daughter: Today in the morning I heard papa said, "Please God let me go to the bathroom..."

Edward walks out of a bar, stumbling back and forth with a key in his hand. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches. "Can I help you, fella?", asks the cop. "Yesssh, ssshombody stol my car!" Edward replies. The cop asks, "Okay, where was your car the last time you saw it?". "It was at the end of this key", Edward replies. At this point the cop looks down to see that Edwards p*nis is hanging out of his trousers. The cop asks Edward , "Hey buddy, are you aware that you're exposing yourself? Edward looks down sadly and moans, "OHHH GOD...they got Julie too!"

A demon died and was asked by god what he wanted to become in his next life. The demon said "I wish to become good in my next life. I want to be as pure and white as an angel and also have angel wings... But I still want to drink blood." So god turned him into a maxi pad.

Guy comes up the hill, look up to the sky and yells, "God, I want to hear your opinion! Is Facebook harmful?" And response from heaven, "A moment, I just finish this status.."