Chuck Norris once created a flamethrower by urinating into a lighter.
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Q: How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb ? A: None. They can't turn them on anyway.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
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Q: Did you hear that Saddam Hussein won the toss ? A: He elected to receive.
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So, Donald Rumsfeld is briefing George Bush in the Oval Office. "Oh and finally, sir, three Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq today." Bush goes pale, his jaw hanging open in stunned disbelief. He buries his face in his hands, muttering "My God...My God". "Mr. President," says Cheney, "we lose soldiers all the time, and it's terrible. But I've never seen you so upset. What's the matter?" Bush looks up and says..."How many is a Brazilian?"
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