A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor’s office. "Is it true," she wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?" "Yes, I’m afraid so," the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, "I’m wondering, then, just how serious is my condition because this rescription is marked ‘NO REFILLS’."

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Q: How do you know when you are stoned? A: When you are too phoned to stone home.

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6  

Chuck Norris keeps a list of all his victims, it's called the phone book.

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What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around? Dead Siri-ous.

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Yo' Mama is so nasty, she gave me an ear infection over the phone.

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