Jim asked his friend, Tony, whether he had bought his wife anything for Valentine's Day. "Yes," came the answer from Tony who was a bit of a chauvinist, "I've bought her a belt and a bag." "That was very kind of you," Jim added, 'I hope she appreciated the thought." Tony smiled as he replied, "So do I, and hopefully the vacuum cleaner will work better now."

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Boy: "You know unlike all these other guys, I can make you really happy" Girl: "Why are you leaving?"

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When I offer you food it's just because my mother raised me right. As a firend, read the truth in my eyes and politely decline.

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Q: What would it be a good idea for you to do after a man takes your wife? A: Let him keep her!

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How come there aren't that many jokes about Jim Jones? The punchlines are too long.

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