What do you call a virgin on a waterbed? A cherry float.

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What do Princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common? Their last big hit was The Wall.

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I wish I could see things from your point of view, unfortunately I can't stick my head that far up my ass.

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First cannibal: "Come and have dinner in our but tonight." Second cannibal: "What are you having?" First cannibal: "Hard-boiled legs."

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Q: Why do you put babies into a blender feet first? A: So you can see the look in their eyes when you turn it on!

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