Q: What was Hitler's favorite toy as a kid? A: An Easy-Bake Oven.
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Daddy to his son: I don't care if you are dating a black girl - they are all pink on the inside.
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It's a slow day in heaven, so St. Peter decides to show a new guy around. St. Peter shows him all of the sights: the golf course, library, observation deck, cafeteria and a huge room full of clocks. "What's up with those clocks, Peter?" "Everyone on Earth has a clock that shows how much time he has left. When a clock runs out of time, the person dies and comes to the gates to be judged." The guy notices that some of the clocks are going faster than others. St. Peter tells him that every time a living person tells a lie, it speeds up his clock. The guy notices one clock in the center o ... read more
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Q: Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles? A: Because his wife died.
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Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
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