Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper, had recently died. "You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God." Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"

 539

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Latecomer: Am I too late for the bonfire? Host: No jump up there on the sticks, there is room next to that Guy.

 36

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A single car crash kills a Mexican family. 15 people died.

 628

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Q: Did you hear her eyes were blue? A: Yeah, one blew this way, one blew that way...

 206

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Q: Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles? A: Because his wife died.

 277

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