Whats the difference between a jew camp and a summer camp? The kids come back.

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Q: How do you make a cat go ‘woof’? A: Soak it in petrol, and set it on fire.

 510

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After a long labour, a doctor approaches the new mother and says, "Ma'am, I've got some good news, and some bad news. What would you like?" After quickly thinking it over, she responds, "I'll have the bad news first doctor". The doctor replies, "We'll, I'm not sure how to put this, and I'm sorry to have to tell you, your child has red hair". Relieved, a smile spreads across the mother face. "Doctor, if that's the bad news, what's the good news". The doctor replies, "He's dead".

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What's red, bubbly, and scratches at the window before exploding? A baby in a microwave.

 169

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What do you call a virgin on a waterbed? A cherry float.

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