Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer.
Too bad he has never cried.
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And these kids do not deserve a present from me, because they have not been eating well this year, - said Santa Claus, flying over the starving kids in Sudan.
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Always go to other people’s funerals, or they won’t go to yours.
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What's the last thing that went through Princess Diana's mind?
The dashboard.
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Did you hear that Princess Di was on the radio a couple of weeks ago?
Yep, and on the dashboard, and on the window, and on the hood....