Latecomer: Am I too late for the bonfire?
Host: No jump up there on the sticks, there is room next to that Guy.
37
0
"I'm going to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage. But it is just a formality."
"Who told you that?"
"Gynecologist."
178
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When you were in the gang then, you just had to look cool, just walk around and look like you were tough.
Someone started talking about fighting -- 'No, man, I've got to go home.'
207
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Q: Why are ghosts bad liars?
A: Because you can see right through them!
195
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Why is there always hot water at childbirth?
In case of a stillbirth, soup.