Did you here about the man that died from eating Rocky Mountain Oysters? The bull must have drug him a mile!

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A blonde walks into a drugstore and purchases a pack of condoms. "That will be $1.08, please," says the clerk. "What are the eight cents for?" asks the blonde. "It says one dollar right here on the packaging." "Tax," replies the clerk. "Gee," says the blonde, "I thought you just rolled them on and they stayed put."

 1033

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Q: What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A: A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

 438

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If the sea was weed and i was a duck i'd swim my way down and smoke my way up, but the sea ain't weed and i'm not a duck so pass me the bong and shut the fuck up

 1555

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I like my women the same as I like my whiskey ... 20 years old and mixed up with coke !

 581

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