Charlie Sheen can achieve recovery by taking a drug called Chuck Norris.

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Q: Why is there cotton in medicine bottles? A: To remind the black people they were cotton pickers before they were drug dealers.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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Doctor (to the patient: "Did I not give you the medicine yesterday? Did you take it?" Patient: "Yes, sir. But I did not drink it." Doctor: "Why?" Patient (Pointing to the bottle): "Because it is written on the label: 'Close the cork tightly and keep it in a cool place.'"

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Everyone should stop hating on Lance Armstrong. He won 7 Toure De France's on DRUGS! When I'm on drugs, I can't even FIND my bicycle.

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