What does an annoying pepper do? It get's jalapeño face
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How do you make a milkshake? Give a cow a pogo stick.
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A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence: he's allowed to say two words every seven years. After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. "Cold floors," he says. They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for his two words. He clears his throats and says, "Bad food." They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him in for his two words. "I quit," he says. "That's not surprising," the elders say. "You've done nothing but complain since you got here."
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If God didn't want us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of food.
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What do you call a take-out low-calorie meal for a cowboy? A Saddle Light Dish.
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