Two cannibals were having their dinner.
One said to the other "I don't like your friend."
The other one said, "Well, put him to one side and just eat the vegetables."
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"Well, children," said the cannibal cooking teacher.
"What did you make of the new English teacher?"
"Burgers, ma'am."
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A husband and a wife sit at the table, having dinner.
The woman drops a bit of tomato sauce on her white top.
"Och, I look like a pig!"
The man nods, "And you dropped tomato sauce on your top!"
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2
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
"How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago."
