The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee... with his breath.
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Why wouldn't the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
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What is a bear's favourite drink? Koka-Koala.
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My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.
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Back in my day, we didn't watch TV while we ate dinner. We actually talked to each other. It was awful!
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