What does a British potato say when it thinks something is wonderful?
It's mashing!
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A blonde walks into a library and asks the librarian, "Can I have a burger and fries?"
She replies, "Sorry, this is a library."
The blonde whispers, "Oh, sorry. May I have a burger and fries?"
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Yo' Mama is so stupid, she tried to put the leftover orange juice back in the rind.
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Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
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William: May I have some money for the man crying outside ?
Mum: What crying man ?
William: The one that's crying, 'Ice cream! Ice Cream !'
