A desperate man goes to the doctor because he can't get a hard-on. He says " Doc I can't live without sex, I need the use of my equipment back!! " The Doc says " There is an experimental procedure where the mucles of a baby elephants' trunk are removed and implanted in your penis, this gives you the full use of your penis." Great I'll do it. Some time after the procedure, the man is at dinner with his date. He feels a rustle in his pants. So he just ignored it. It happens again. So he figured it just needed some air. So he unzips his pants to let it out. The problem seemed to g ... read more
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Chuck Norris once soaked his beard in carbonated water. The result is now sold as Red Bull.
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Q: What do you get when you mix beans and onions? A: Tear gas.
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If Chuck Norris were an Adam's Apple, he'd be in your throat right now.
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The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee... with his breath.
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