What's the difference between an old cat and a baby kitten? An old cat scratches and bites but a little pussy never hurt anybody!

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This guy said send me a naked pic, so I sent him a picture of my kitty. She's not wearing any clothes.

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Q: Why did the silly kid try to feed pennies to the cat? A: Because his mother told him to put money in the kitty.

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Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray this cushy life to keep. I pray for toys that look like mice, And sofa cushions, soft and nice. I pray for gourmet kitty snacks, And someone nice to scratch my back, For windowsills all warm and bright, For shadows to explore at night. I pray I'll always stay real cool And keep the secret feline rule To never tell a human that The world is really ruled by cats!

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Q: What do you get if you cross a fence post was a kitty? A: A poleca.

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