Q: What's faster than a speeding bullet? A: A Jew with a coupon.

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One day Kermit the Frog was looking sad. Fozzie Bear went up to him and asked what was wrong. Kermit said, "I'm having problems with Miss Piggy." "Like what?" asked Fozzie. "Well, Piggy wants me to eat her out and I can't." Fozzie asked, "So, what's wrong with that? You're not a prude or anything." "No," sighed Kermit, "but I am a Jew."

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A Jewish guy got in a taxi cab...5 min into a ride the driver notice a man beating up a woman on the other side of the street. The driver rush to the scene. He open the door ran out as soon as he did that the Jewish guy roll down his window as fast as he can and shouted, "Stop it, stop it, stop the meter."

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Q: How many jews can you fit in a VW Beetle? A: 54, two in the front, two in the back, and fifty in the ashtray.

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