Q: What are the three rings of marriage? A: The engagement ring, the wedding ring and the suffering.

At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl. Immediately he began paying her court and flattering her outrageously. The girl liked the young man, but she was taken a bit aback by his fast and ardent pitch. She was amazed when after 30 minutes he seriously proposed marriage. "Look," she said. "We only met a half hour ago. How can you be so sure? We know nothing about each other." "You're wrong," the young man declared. "For the past 5 years I've been working in the bank where your father has his account."

I used to hate weddings, all the old ladies would prod me and say "you'll be next!" They soon stopped that, when I started saying it to them at funerals !

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, “Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?” The other replied, “Yes, I am, I married the wrong man.”

What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.