Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
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What's funner then nailing bin Laden to a tree? Feeding his lifeless corpse into a meat grinder.
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What to do if you fall into a conversation with someone about the terrorist attacks who doesn't believe in retaliation: 1. Engage in conversation, and ask if military force is appropriate. 2. When he says "No," ask, "Why not?" 3. Wait until he says something to the effect of "Because that would just cause more innocent deaths, which would be awful and we should not cause more violence." 4. When he's in mid sentence, punch him in the face as hard as you can. 5. When he gets back up to punch you, point out that it would be a mistake and contrary to his values to strike you, because that wou ... read more
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Chuk Norris was only twice angry, and those times are known as WWI and WWII.
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"If women ruled the world," said my wife, "there'd be no wars."  "That's true," I replied. "Wars require strategy and logic."
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