Every time you're sad, just remember that somewhere out there a tree grew for years and years, but was then destroyed and became material for a Justin Bieber notebook.
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What do you call it when Miley Cyrus falls down?
Hoe-Down.
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What do Princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common?
Their last big hit was The Wall.
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Did you hear about the music app that is preloaded on every iPhone 6 plus?
GarageBend.
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How do you know if Dr. Dre has a high sperm count?
Eminem has to chew before swallowing.