The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.

 176

0  

A man and woman had been married for 30 years, and in those 30 years, they always left the lights off when having sex. He was embarrassed and scared that he couldn't please her, so he always used a big dildo on her. All these years she had no clue. One day, she decided to reach over and flip the light switch on and saw that he was using a dildo. She said "I knew it, asshole, explain the dildo!" He said, "Explain the kids!"

 173

0  

Why do women need guys? Vibrators don’t usually pay for drinks.

 180

0  

What is the smallest hotel in the world? A p***y - because you gotta leave your bags outside!

 210

0  

My girlfriend told me to give her 12 inches and make it hurt! So I Fucked her 3 times and then hit her with a baseball bat.

 187

0