Sex is bad Sex is a sin Sins are forgiven So stick it in.

An Irish priest and a Rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train. After a while, the priest opened a conversation by saying "I know that, in your religion, you’re not supposed to eat pork... Have you actually ever tasted it?" The Rabbi said, "I must tell the truth. Yes, I have, on the odd occasion." Then the Rabbi had his turn of interrogation. He asked, "Your religion, too... I know you’re supposed to be celibate. But..." The priest replied, "Yes, I know what you’re going to ask. I have succumbed once or twice." There was silence for a while. Then the Rabbi peeped aroun ... read more

My wife's cooking is so bad we usually pray after our food.

Q: Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused a Novocain injection during root canal treatment? A: He wanted to transcend dental medication!

Q: Why can't atheists solve exponential equations? A: Because they don't believe in higher powers.