Two men were walking along the street when they came upon a dog licking his dick. One man said, "I sure wish I could do that." The other replied, "You can, but you're probably going to have to pet him first."

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Why are there no zebras in Czech zoos? Czechs and stripes don’t mix.

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What do you call an unusual rabbit? A rare hare.

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Why did the moron give the sleepy cow a hammer? He wanted her to hit the hay!

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A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy.“

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