Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
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Why does the chicken is sad? Because his dad is a cock. Why does the chicken is even more sad? Because he faces the same future.
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If you had a gun and you were being chased by a bull and a mountain lion, which one would you shoot first? The mountain lion. You can always shoot the bull.
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Pet Owner: "Every time a bell rings, my dog goes and sits in the corner." Vet: "That's perfectly normal; he's a boxer."
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In year 1272 Arabics invented the condom, using a goat's lower intestine.  In year 1873 the British somewhat reinvented the condom by taking it out of the goat first.
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