Why did Bossy tell the cowpoke to leave her calf alone?  She thought children should be seen and not herded!

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One day little Johnny was digging a hole in his back yard. The next-door neighbor spotted him and decided to investigate. "Hello Johnny, what are you up to?" he asked. "My goldfish died and I'm gonna bury him," Johnny replied. "That's a really big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" asked the neighbor. "That's because he's inside your cat!"

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A man goes to the circus. After the show he speaks to the manager and asks for a job. "Alright, what can you do?", the manager asks. "I can do great bird impressions", the man replies. "Pssh, a lot of people can do that". "Oh well", the man says and flies away.

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Did you hear about the whale who couldn't keep a secret? He was a blubber mouth.

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Chuck Norris can make a turtle go faster.

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