If Santa comes down the chimney this year and tries to stuff you in his sack, don't worry, because I wished for you for Christmas.
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Two monsters went to a Halloween party.
Suddenly one said to the other, "A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?"
The other monster replied, "Be a gentleman and roll them back to her."
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Trafic policeman: "Didn't you hear my whistle, madam?"
Woman driver: "Yes, but I don't like flirting while I'm driving."
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Baby, if you were an iPhone 6, I would tap you all day!
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Sweet candies are nice to eat, sweet words are easy to say, but sweet people are hard to find.
Oh my God!
How did you find me?
