Put a "Please Use Other Door" sign on the entrance to your office building if it only has one entrance.

 1457

1  

Change the coffee in the office coffee maker to decaf.

 1420

1  

Q: Why did the can crusher quit his job? A: Because it was soda pressing.

 1043

0  

Office executive "Sir, can I have a day off next week to visit my mother-in-law?" Boss "Certainly not!" Office executive "Thank you so much sir! I knew you would be understanding."

 2076

1  

Two programmers after work, talking in a pub: "You will never believe me when I tell you what happened to me yesterday. I met a very nice blonde in a bar." - And what did you do ? "I invited her to my place, we had some drinks and then the girl asked me to undress her." "Are you kidding me ? And what did you do then?" "I got her blouse and her dress off and then i got her to sit on my office, right next to my new laptop." "Oh, you got a new laptop. What model and what are its specifications?"

 1200

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