Q: Did you hear about the annoying midget who went to a nudist colony? A: He kept getting in everyone's hair.

Hey, did you hear about the cannibal who arrived late to the dinner party? They gave him the cold shoulder!

After losing his fortune, a Texas oilman decided to spend his last twenty bucks at a whorehouse. He entered and promptly went up to the Madam and asked her what he could get for $20. The Madam gave him a lengthy stare and told him to go upstairs, last door on the left. He proceeded to march up the stairs and entered the room. To his shock and pleasure he saw a beautiful blonde waiting naked on the bed. So he tore off his clothes and jumped on and started pumping away for dear life. Upon orgasm he noticed that stuff started oozing out of her eyeballs. He runs down to the Madam to rep ... read more

What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long? A runny bunny.

How is parsley like pubic hair? You push it aside to eat, and sometimes it gets stuck between your teeth after meals.