Q: What's the difference between hockey player and hippie girl? A: Hockey player will take shower after 3 periods.

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"How are your hemorrhoids?" "Swell."

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How do you know when your sister is on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood.

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Say, "Do I smell popcorn?" right after you fart. So everybody takes a big whiff.

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What's red and sits in a corner? A baby playing with a razor blade.

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