Prostitute 1: Tonight's my night I can smell c**k in the air.
Prostitute 2: Oh, sorry. I burped.
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As she lay there dozing next to me a voice inside my head kept saying, "Relax, you are not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients."
But another voice kept saying, "Howard, you are a veterinarian."
308
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Why did God give women legs?
So they don't leave a trail like a slug.
207
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Some advice for guys: When the red river's flowin', take the dirt road.
189
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An asp in the grass is a snake, but a grasp in the ass is a goose.
