Hey, did you hear about the cannibal who arrived late to the dinner party? They gave him the cold shoulder!
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A guy in a supermarket goes up to the cashier and places two cans of dog food on the counter. The cashier asks, "Do you have a dog sir?" "Yes, it's at home," replies the man. "To be able to sell you the dog food sir, I must see the dog. That is store policy," says the cashier. Next day the man goes places two cans of cat food on the counter. "Do you own a cat sir?" asks the cashier. "Yes I do, it's at home," says the man. "Well I am sorry sir. Store policy. I must see the cat before I can sell you cat food," says the cashier. The next day the man returns to the store and walks directly ... read more
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What's the warmest organ in a dead woman's body? My dick.
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What do you call a trash bag full of mutilated laboratory monkeys? Rhesus Pieces.
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What do you give Mikey for his 18th birthday? A 90 year old woman, because Mikey will eat anything.
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