Man comes home from work to find his boyfriend whacking off into a condom. Man says, "WTF?" Boyfriend says, "I am making you a sack lunch!"
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“A happy marriage is nothing but a give and take relationship; the husband gives and the wife takes.”
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"Does she have a boyfriend?" "Yes, a cute, strong and clever one." "What's the name?" "John, Michael and Bill."
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"What happened to your girlfriend, that really cute math student?" "She no longer is my girlfriend. I caught her cheating on me." "I don't believe that she cheated on you!" "Well, a couple of nights ago I called her on the phone, and she told me that she was in bed wrestling with three unknowns..."
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Me: "I'm so lonely." Person: "Hey!" Me: "Leave me alone."
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