If I've invested precious time and energy in a relationship, and I've been honest and open, hanging and coping, true blue, a good screw, to some fly guy who's out constantly getting high, then I'm dumped suicide is not one of my thoughts. I'm thinking maybe homicide.

 564

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I hear Taylor Swift's ex boyfriends are collabing on a new single called "Maybe You're The Problem".

 710

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Q: What do two rednecks say after breaking up? A: Lets just be cousins.

 1418

2  

My girlfriend is like February 30th, she doesn't exist.

 3641

1  

I just ended a long-term relationship today. I'm not too bothered, it wasn't mine.

 510

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