A man returns home and find his wife with his best friend.
He takes out the gun and shoots his friend to death.
His wife: "Listen, if you stay in such character, you will lose all your friends."
870
0
Today my stoner friend used my to-do list as a blunt wrap.
He was high on my list of priorities.
3348
1
Patient to friend: "I saw the doctor to day about my loss of memory."
Friend: "What did he do?"
Patient: "He made me pay him in advance."
1680
3
When I offer you food it's just because my mother raised me right.
As a firend, read the truth in my eyes and politely decline.
4447
1
Get bad marks, relatives will insult you.
Get good marks, friends will insult you.
