The Equation of Marriage: 7 Glance = 1 Smile, 7 Smile = 1 Meeting, 7 Meeting = 1 Kiss, 7 Kisses = 1 Proposal, 7 Proposal = 1 Marriage – And that 1 marriage has 77777+ problems...So beware of glance!

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A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance in court.” said the Desk Sergeant. “No, no no!” said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying to do that for years!”

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Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.

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My wife treats me like a God – every evening at dinner I get a burnt offering.

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As a couple gets into bed, the husband starts to rub and kiss his wife. She turns over and says, "I'm sorry, honey. I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The husband sadly turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife. "Do you have a dentist appointment, too?"

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