I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits.
He said, "How flexible are you?"
I said, "I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays."
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When Chuck Norris goes to the gym the treadmill sweats.
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I do two hours of cardio every day.
But I still need to find the closest parking spot to the gym.
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When Chuck Norris finishes his workout, the gym takes a break.
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A classic Tommy Cooper gag "I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?"
He said, "How flexible are you?"
I said, "I can't make Tuesdays", was fifth.
