Maths is like s*x... ADD the bed MINUS the clothes DIVIDE the legs and pray you don't MULTIPLY.

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Q: How many mathematicians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: On average or do you want the whole distribution?

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Teacher: What's 2 and 2? Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good. Pupil: Good? That's perfect!

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How I see math word problems: If you have 4 pencils and 7 apples, how many pancakes will fit on the roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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First Caribou: What kind of math do owls like? Second Caribou: Owlgebra.

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