What do gays call hemorrhoids ? Speed bumps.

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In the medical community, death is referred to as "Chuck Norris Disease".

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If Chuck Norris had to he could give CPR to himself.

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Chuck Norris' pulse-rate is measured on the Richter Scale.

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Patient to friend: "I saw the doctor to day about my loss of memory." Friend: "What did he do?" Patient: "He made me pay him in advance."

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