The best thing about Alzheimer's Disease is that you get to meet so many new people.

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What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea? A salad shooter.

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What do you get when you cross Billy Ray Cyrus with a yeast infection? An itchy, twitchy twat!

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What do you call a van with 5 faggots in it? The AIDS team.

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A fat lady (To a health expert): "Give me some advice that can reduce my fatness." Health expert: "Okay. You must move your head to the right and the left at a particular time." Fat lady: "At which particular time?" Health expert: "Whenever anybody asks you to eat."

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