What do you do for exercise?
I lift weights.
What do you do for cardio?
I lift weights faster.
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Two cows are standing in a field.
One says to the other "Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?"
The other one says "No, It doesn't worry me, I'm a horse!"
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„And, Johnny? How did your school report turn out?" asks mother.
„Come on mom, the most important thing is that I'm healthy!"
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I gave up my seat to a blind person in the bus.
That is how I lost my job as a bus driver.
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Why did the computer get cold?
Because it forgot to close windows.
