Boy: "You know unlike all these other guys, I can make you really happy" Girl: "Why are you leaving?"

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Question: Why are hurricanes sometimes named after women? Answer: When they come they’re wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them.

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Question: What do you call a woman with two brain cells? Answer: Pregnant.

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A woman runs into a doctor’s office and says “DOCTOR! DOCTOR! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts!” The doctor replied, “Show me.” So the woman poked her ankle and screamed of pain. Then she poked her knee and yelled OW. She poked her forehead and screamed again. She was about to continue when the doctor said, “That’s enough, let me think this over.” He thought for about a minute and said “I think I know what your problem is. You broke your finger.”

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Q: How do you know when a women's about to say something smart? A: When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me...."

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