A teacher is talking to a student.
Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
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Teacher: Can you see God?
Student: No
Teacher: Can you touch God?
Student: No
Teacher: Then there is no God
Student: Ma’am can you see your brain?
Teacher: No
Student: Can you touch your brain?
Teacher: No
Student: Okay! No comments!!
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A: "I was born in California."
B: "Which part?"
A: "All of me."
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Wife: Look at that drunk guy
Husband: Who is he?
Wife: 10 years ago he proposed me and I rejected him
Husband: Oh my God. He is still celebrating.
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Trainer: If an old man and a child come near your car, what will you hit?
Girl: Old man.
Trainer: Idiot. You should hit the BRAKE.