Interviewer: How much milk do these cows give? Farmer: Which one? The Black one or the brown one? Interviewer: Brown one. Farmer: A couple of liters per day. Interviewer: And the black one? Farmer: A couple of liters per day. Interviewer (naturally a bit flummoxed): I see. What do you give them to eat? Farmer: Which one? Black or brown? Interviewer: Black. Farmer: It eats grass. Interviewer: And the other one? Farmer: Grass. Interviewer (now annoyed): Why do you keep asking which one when the answers are the same? Farmer: Because, the black one’s mine. Interviewer: Oh, and the br ... read more

Graham Alexander Bell: I used to study under a candle William Shakespeare: I used to study under street light Mr. Bean: What did you guys do during the daytime?

Relative: Son, what’s your age? Guy: 25 Relative: it’s an age of marriage, son. When will you marry? Guy: Very soon. And what’s your age, uncle? Relative: 70 Guy: it’s an age of death, uncle. When will you die?

Interviewer: Do you speak English? Applicant: Yes Interviewer: Name? Applicant: Gurmeet Ram and from India Interviewer: Sex? Applicant: Three to five times a week. Interviewer: No, no… I mean male or female? Applicant: Yes, male, female, sometimes Pig. Interviewer: Holy cow! Applicant: No Cow she is our mother and we drink her piss. Interviewer: But isn’t it hostile? Applicant: Horse style, doggy style, any style! Interviewer: Oh dear! Applicant: No, no! Deer runs too fast.

Boy: Hey, you look so beautiful Girl: Aww. Thank you. I don’t know what to say. Boy: Just lie something, like I did.