Graham Alexander Bell: I used to study under a candle
William Shakespeare: I used to study under street light
Mr. Bean: What did you guys do during the daytime?
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Teacher: Can you see God?
Student: No
Teacher: Can you touch God?
Student: No
Teacher: Then there is no God
Student: Ma’am can you see your brain?
Teacher: No
Student: Can you touch your brain?
Teacher: No
Student: Okay! No comments!!
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Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
A: Yes, because the Empire State Building can't jump!
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Grandfather: When I was your age, I used to go to the market with two Rupees and bring home soap, rice, milk, bread, ghee, face powder etc.
Grandson: nowadays it is difficult. There are CCTV cameras everywhere.
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Boy: (calls 911) Hello, I need your help!
911: Alright, What is it?
Boy: Two girls are fighting over me!
911: So what’s your emergency?
Boy: The ugly one is winning.