Q: What's the last thing you usually hear before a redneck dies? A: Hey y'all... Watch this!

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Q: What is a redneck's last words? A: Hold my beer and watch this!

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Q: What do you call a redneck that's bursting into flames? A: A fire cracker.

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A redneck boy runs into his house and proclaims, "I've found the girl that I'm gonna marry! And she's a virgin!" Incensed, his father pounds his fist on the table. "There's no way you'll marry that girl! If she aint' good enough for her own family, she ain't good enough for ours."

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Q: How does a redneck tell the difference between a bull and a cow in the dark? A: He sticks his nose in the animal's ass. If there's a place for his tongue, it's a cow.

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