Man: You've brought religion into my life.
Woman: Really? How?
Man: Until I met you, I didn't believe in Hell.
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How come the village Guy Fawkes won the Nobel Peace Prize?
Cause he was outstanding in his field.
121
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First Michael Jackson and now Neil Armstrong...
God is clearly no fan of moonwalkers.
446
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Why It Sucks to Be an Egg...
You only get laid once, you only get hard once, and when you DO finally get hard, it takes under three minutes and you're already in hot water.
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Madonna is 54 and her boyfriend's 25, Jennifer Lopez is 43 and her boyfriend's 26, so if you're single its ok, maybe he's just not born yet.
