A man makes a phone call to an export office in a port of France, and asks whether they can ship a 20’ container with live geese properly stored in their appropriate places. Oui monsieur; what is the destination port for this load? I’m sending them to the zoo in Brazil. Wouldn’t you be better off calling the export office in Portugal? Why is that sir? If you’re sending them to Brazil to avoid bureaucracy, then you should contact the Portuguese; of course!

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If life hands you lemons, break out the tequila!

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A: Why are you late? B: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. A: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it? B: No, I was standing on it.

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Mary's father has 5 daughters, 1. Nana 2. Nono 3. Nini 4. Nene What is the fifth daughters name?

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Justin Bieber puked on stage. That settles it, she's pregnant.

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