Chuck Norris is the meaning of life. Too bad he's also the meaning of death.

Man returning with his wife from guests. Drunk man drives car better than his sober wife. But there is only one problem, how to explain that to the policeman?

I'm going to stand outside. So if anyone asks, I am outstanding.

An archaeologist in Egypt was taking a walk in the town square one morning. He had to get back to the hotel for a meeting but had forgotten his wristwatch. He was walking by an old man sitting on a low stool by his camel and asked if he knew the time. The old man slowly reached over and pushed the camel's testicles to one side and then released them, letting them swing to a stop. "10:27" he said. The archaeologist was stunned as he had never seen someone tell time like that before. He rushed back to the hotel to find his colleagues and then brought them back to the town square to fi ... read more

I used to play tennis, baseball, basketball and chess, but I stopped after my son broke my playstation.