What's the fastest thing in the world? A beer truck driving through an Indian reserve. What's the second fastest thing in the world? The Indians running after it.

 379

0  

I like my girl to be Hannah on the streets but Miley in the sheets.

 317

0  

That awkward moment when you're about to hug someone sexy as hell and then you hit the mirror.

 66

0  

Kim and Kanye naming their baby North West is just like Brad Pitt naming his kid Arm.

 485

0  

Sherlock Holmes dies and goes to Heaven. There is a brouhaha. Sherlock Holmes asks St. Peter what seems to be the problem. Apparently, Adam has gone 'walkabout' among all the souls. It will take ages to find him. Holmes tracks down Adam, very quickly. The Lord asks Holmes how he recognized Adam among the millions of souls, without ever having met him. "Elementary, my dear God, he has no navel."

 615

0