Q: Why do liberals travel in threes? A: One to read, one to write and the other one to keep an eye on both intellectuals.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear flowers in his hair when he goes to San Francisco, he wears poison ivy.

An Irish priest and a Rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train. After a while, the priest opened a conversation by saying "I know that, in your religion, you’re not supposed to eat pork... Have you actually ever tasted it?" The Rabbi said, "I must tell the truth. Yes, I have, on the odd occasion." Then the Rabbi had his turn of interrogation. He asked, "Your religion, too... I know you’re supposed to be celibate. But..." The priest replied, "Yes, I know what you’re going to ask. I have succumbed once or twice." There was silence for a while. Then the Rabbi peeped aroun ... read more

A Lady calls the airline office in New York and asks, "How long does it take to fly to Hawaii?" The clerk says to her, "Just a second." The woman says "Thank you", and hangs up.

Q: Why don't witches wear panties when flying on their broomsticks? A: Better traction.