Q: How does David Beckham change a light bulb? A: He holds it in the air, and the world revolves around him.

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Chuck Norris can run a full marathon in just 3 miles.

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What would you get if you crossed a grizzly with the world's greatest basketball player? Bear Jordan.

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Q: How does Mike Tyson differ from Metallica? A: Metallica leaves a ringing in your ears. Tyson leaves your ear in a ring.

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"Waiter, this vinegar is rather lumpy." Waiter: "That's because they're pickled onions, sir."

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