“I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. Then it dawned on me . . . they’re cramming for their final exam.”

 794

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Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.

 1231

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Q: Why didn't go Noah fishing? A: He only had two worms.

 770

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Q: Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible? A: When Joseph served in Pharaoh's court.

 618

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Q: How many people can you fit in one Honda? A: Well, the Bible said that all 12 disciples were in one Accord.

 1227

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