Chuck Norris gave Black Ops a thumbs up and people at Microsoft a roundhouse kick in the face. Suck it Microsoft.

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Chuck Norris has no need for a TV remote. He stares at his television, until it changes the channel.

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What do you call a bent iPhone 6 plus? A dead wringer.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram

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At recent trade talks the American representative offered to sell sophisticated American telephone technology to the Russians. American : "In the United States, anyone can pick up any phone and dial 9-1-1. This will record the call and connect them with the police." Russian : "In Russia we don't require that you dial anything."

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