An accountant and a lawyer were laying on a beach in Hawaii sipping mai tai's. The lawyer started telling the accountant how he came to be there. "I had this downtown property in Memphis that caught fire and after the insurance paid off, I came here." The accountant said, "I had a downtown property, too, in Miami. It got flooded so here I am with the insurance proceeds." The lawyer took another sip of his mai tai, and then asked in a puzzled voice, "How do you start a flood?"

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Chuck Norris once decided to dig a hole, today we call it the Grand Canyon.

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"It's clear" said the teacher, "That you haven't studied your geography. What's your excuse?" "Well, my dad says the world is changing every day. So I decided to wait until it settles down!"

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Q: Why do birds fly south in the winter? A: Because it's too far to walk!

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Q: Why can't women read maps? A: Because only the male mind can comprehend the concept of 1 inch equals a mile.

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